disclaimer: this will likely be the most seinfeldesque post i've ever written. proceed cautiously.
so what's the deal with hand dipped ice cream? i can't remember the first time i saw a sign telling me an ice cream was hand dipped, but i remember being confused. i mean, what's the point? i suppose it does distinguish a certain kind of ice cream from another, say soft serve or homemade. but i think there's also this arrogance like people are going to extra trouble to hand dip this stuff. like i should be impressed that you had to scoop the ice cream. and really, is that any more work than twisting the cone under the spout of the soft serve? if anything, i think making a good twisty cone is harder.
well the other day i seriously heard the most moronic extension of this marketing: hand spun milkshakes. really? you mean you actually went to the trouble to hold a cup in your hand as a machine mixed the stuff around. robots didn't do this? oh, well then i'll have one. i was on the fence, but now that i know what enormous trouble you went to, sign me up.
i'm living suede.
21 July 2008
11 July 2008
to scoot or not to scoot
so because i'm a tree hugging hippie commie, i bought a scooter a couple weeks ago - to try and cut all ties with exxon mobil and their ilk. i really, REALLY like it. it's a blue honda metropolitan (i know, could i be any more metro?!). it gets, no lying, 100+ mpg. and it's really zippy to ride around on. i'm thinking of calling it "peppy" (i hope someone, maybe casey, gets the curb reference). but, of course, anytime i try to advance the cause of reason and sensibility let alone care for the environment or good stewardship, the "man" has to put his boot on my neck in a way that defies all logic.
i bought the scooter in tennessee, cause i just like trafficking vehicles across state lines. but i tried to do the right thing and take it in to the courthouse to pay tax on it and get it registered and all that legal stuff. let me preface what follows by saying the people who work there seem to hate life and their jobs a lot. people that work in fast food have more joy. anyway, i ask them what i need to do and show them my forms. this one lady (who just loathes me) gets on the phone with someone for a while. she returns and tells me it's illegal for me to ride it on the road; it can only be used for offroad purposes. um, it's a scooter. it's having enough trouble navigating a course that isn't circling the arch de triomphe. but it's certainly not IN ANY WAY for offroading. but the reason she gave me is the kicker: the minimum engine size they'll register is 50cc ~ "peppy" is, wait for it, 49cc. UNACCEPTABLE.
so i guess this place will be my selma or something. i'm not taking it back. i'm going to flagrantly break the law on a regular basis. i answer to a God that loves creation and hates violence, and i'm going to ride this vehicle that barely pollutes and doesn't cause wars. i know that doesn't make sense to most people around the planet, but i'm about changing their minds. in the meantime i'll probably be setting up a legal defense fund for the inevitable court battles ahead. i know i can count on you for a cake with a saw in it when it comes to that. viva la revolution!
i bought the scooter in tennessee, cause i just like trafficking vehicles across state lines. but i tried to do the right thing and take it in to the courthouse to pay tax on it and get it registered and all that legal stuff. let me preface what follows by saying the people who work there seem to hate life and their jobs a lot. people that work in fast food have more joy. anyway, i ask them what i need to do and show them my forms. this one lady (who just loathes me) gets on the phone with someone for a while. she returns and tells me it's illegal for me to ride it on the road; it can only be used for offroad purposes. um, it's a scooter. it's having enough trouble navigating a course that isn't circling the arch de triomphe. but it's certainly not IN ANY WAY for offroading. but the reason she gave me is the kicker: the minimum engine size they'll register is 50cc ~ "peppy" is, wait for it, 49cc. UNACCEPTABLE.
so i guess this place will be my selma or something. i'm not taking it back. i'm going to flagrantly break the law on a regular basis. i answer to a God that loves creation and hates violence, and i'm going to ride this vehicle that barely pollutes and doesn't cause wars. i know that doesn't make sense to most people around the planet, but i'm about changing their minds. in the meantime i'll probably be setting up a legal defense fund for the inevitable court battles ahead. i know i can count on you for a cake with a saw in it when it comes to that. viva la revolution!
01 July 2008
worse than fiction
just when i think i've heard the most ridiculous thing possible, i remember there's always room for improvement. i've now heard twice about the environmental protection agency sending the bush administration a document about controlling greenhouse gases. this document was the result of the epa obeying a ruling from the supreme court. as this the new york times article reports, the bush administration chose to ignore the document by refusing to open the e-mail which held the document. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/25/washington/25epa.html?_r=1&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&adxnnlx=1214920490-3WOjSZifpRF+CKY/LyYC8w
i guess normally i would be outraged at a branch of government behaving like a petulant child with his fingers in his ears yelling in order to ignore what he doesn't want to hear. but really it's just par for the course, so i've pretty much accepted it. the truly outraging part is that it continues to work, as it did with the epa which sent a revised document watering down its proposals. hey, you can't fault a winning strategy.
maybe at some point there will be enough rational, passionate people to hold government officials accountable and fire them for incompetency and bumbling disregard for all ethics. but apparently that's not gonna happen today. today we're just like the white house - willfully ignoring the obvious disaster ahead.
i guess normally i would be outraged at a branch of government behaving like a petulant child with his fingers in his ears yelling in order to ignore what he doesn't want to hear. but really it's just par for the course, so i've pretty much accepted it. the truly outraging part is that it continues to work, as it did with the epa which sent a revised document watering down its proposals. hey, you can't fault a winning strategy.
maybe at some point there will be enough rational, passionate people to hold government officials accountable and fire them for incompetency and bumbling disregard for all ethics. but apparently that's not gonna happen today. today we're just like the white house - willfully ignoring the obvious disaster ahead.
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