I'm Back, Baby!

How on earth is it a week until Christmas? There’s not even a description for the warp speed with which the last few weeks and months have raced. But I made a promise to write more posts this year than I did last year, so there is precious time to waste. That kinda rhymed. I didn’t intend for that to happen.

One of the reasons I haven’t been writing is overall depression - both clinical and general. I don’t think I’ve written much about my depression and anxiety on this blog, but that will be changing. I’m coming out of the “crazy closet” as I call it, and you’ll be hearing much more about this side of my life. I’m sure you’ll hate it, but whatever.

So, around mid-August I fell back into a really rough patch of d/a (depression/anxiety). Had to go back on medication which then had to be tweaked a bit. There was a longer adjustment period than I thought there would be. But I have been mostly good for a little over a month. At the same time, my general depression about what’s going on in American culture and society has teetered back and forth from slight hope to utter despair. More mass shootings and more inaction about it being at all the fault of guns. Pure and complete dumbassedness coming from Washington in general and the White House in particular. Maybe America’s on the brink of nuclear war - who actually knows? Then all of the accusations of sexual assault or inappropriate conduct, which I am overwhelmingly glad about in that people are finding their voice and feeling empowered to speak out about what has happened to them. Also, it’s depressing when it focuses on people you liked, even admired.

Then, Roy Moore. I mean the whole thing brings out so many emotions. I’ll admit, I haven’t been a fan of the guy from the jump. I completely feel like he’s an egomaniac who exploited the religious convictions (which I consider misdirected) of people in order to carve out this weird niche of fame. He’s a judge who isn’t actually a judge because he doesn’t understand the law - but some people think he’s being persecuted for his faith. Then, the allegations start, and it’s got to be game over, right? Nope. And yes, he lost, even though apparently no one (including Almighty God apparently) has told him yet. But over half a million people voted for him. In that figure is an overwhelming population of white, male, “evangelicals.” So, what do I do with this as a white, male pastor? I have to end my silence. I’ve been behaving too much lately. One of my closest friends - practically a second father - pointed this out to me. I need to start breathing fire again. Not for my own sake, but for the sake of those continually being hurt and/or misled by the Church and wolves in shepherd’s clothing.

So, the writing starts again as will more speaking out and likely even direct support of candidates. I have always had an uneasy feeling about the whole church/state thing. But the group that hasn’t had an uneasy feeling has done some terrible shit. So, damn the torpedoes. Let’s roll.