In these hours before Christmas Day I start to ruminate. Reflecting is my routine before I enter the “year in review” portion of my brain festivities. I take stock of where things are in several areas: How is it with my soul (traditional Wesleyan question)? What’s my outlook on the world? Am I growing in my faith (whatever that means) and going on to perfection (being made perfect in love - not having the whitest teeth and best head of hair, as I already have damn fine hair)?
To say this year has been a mixed bag doesn’t quite cover it. I’ve truly experienced joy like none other at the birth of our first child (a masculine child). Also, the Cubs won the World Series. And while I’m in the process of falling out of love with sports (more on that soon), that was and is a big deal to me - especially since my newborn son got to watch the team from the north side win it all.
But there have been all these other things this year. And yes, the election shocked and, in many ways, appalled me. I am not going to get into winners and losers in this post except to say that my overall feeling is that America is losing more and more. As a society, America is losing or has lost any sense of being able to disagree and still remain united. Those with whom I disagree must be idiots, morons, or worse - subhuman. The demonization is rampant and the arrogance is overwhelming. And trust me, I write this with full recognition that I’m one of the most arrogant people I know.
Being able to disagree respectfully is a hallmark of maturity. I haven’t possessed this kind of maturity for long. Even just a few years ago, I wanted to verbally eviscerate those who disagreed with me. During the 2008 election I was invited to a kind of debate. I was to support/defend Barack Obama and the other person invited (who actually had political aspirations) was to do the same for John McCain. It’s fascinating to me now that I even did this, but I behaved childishly. Even though a few people told me that I changed their minds, I realized my dismissal of “the other side” was petty and wrong. It lacked the respect that competition requires.
But when I look at where things are now, it’s so beyond the pale it’s astonishing. The vitriol and downright hatred of “those people” is indefensible. It’s clear that many politicians have no interest in having anything to do with those who disagree with them. They cater to their base endlessly. I don’t believe that they believe most of what they say, but they know what plays and what pays. And perhaps what pisses me off more than anything is that they are never, ever wrong.
This last part offends me so deeply because I feel so many Christians have bought it lock, stock, and barrel. Fundamentalism continues to dominate the Christian landscape in terms of exposure. So a faith that teaches questions, doubts, and curiosities is worthless. People, want answers and the simpler the better. That’s just not where I am, but my own denomination continues to fracture over an inability to disagree while remaining united. This concerns me so much because the last time the Methodists were this divided (it seems to me) was just before The Civil War. The denomination was quite influential then, and its inability to hold together over beliefs about slavery tore at the nation as well. When the denomination split into northern and southern factions, a religious body gave tacit permission if not approval for the country to follow suit. And there are wounds from this that have never healed.
And so division grows today. If you disagree, don’t stay together. Divorce. Leave the church you are in and head to a new one - or even better, start a new one. Yes, sometimes these things are necessary, but doing so out of convenience has become a problem. While you are at it, mock those with whom you disagree and call them names. After all, they don’t really matter. If they really mattered, they would know everything you know. They would be just like you. Everyone in the world would look, think, and act the same. This is what God wants, right?
Funny thing to remember this time of year for us Christians in North America: God wasn’t born here. Of all the options given God, God chose to be born in the Middle East. Jesus’ skin tone likely wasn’t nearly as white as my son’s (I know - most companies and many churches still can’t grasp this - but there it is). From the beginning, Jesus was radically different than anything the world expected. There are those who disagreed with him so much that they had him killed. For them, there was no other way. You are wrong, and you must die. I spend lots of time praying that people of the faith that bears Jesus’ name would reflect on that story and realize that hating and demonizing those with whom we disagree turns us into Jesus’ killers. It makes us literally anti-Christ. It ensures that we will remain far from the purposes God has to restore and renew creation.
So, in the spirit of Christmas, as others have taught it to me, I plan to give myself the gift of less anger and more understanding. I hope to model and teach what I have been taught about disagreeing respectfully and staying together despite differences. I pray this will bring joy to the world, peace on earth, and goodwill to all. I can’t imagine hatred and division will accomplish these things, so let’s give peace a chance.
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